gender equality in African States: I get my inspiration to write from all over the un...

gender equality in African States: I get my inspiration to write from all over the un...: I get my inspiration to write from all over the universe, today interestingly, though its hilarious that this is only my second one in almo...

Is your wife your equal?

I get my inspiration to write from all over the universe, though its hilarious that this is only my second one in almost two years. i do hope this inspirations come a lot more often. lol. anyway, to the matter at hand I’m writing about Gender Equality. yeah yeah, i know the matter has been over flogged but just want to put in my own two pence and believe it or not I got my inspiration from a little group on face book. Let me attempt to give a synopsis of the beginning of this story.

.

A friend posts a short story explaining that in another forum (all women mostly Nigerian), a woman asks a simple question that what should she do when her hubby is away from home and she feels horny, of course like all groups with multiple backgrounds the response varied, some advised her to get drunk, others said pray. Trust some of them to say masturbation is evil and should not be practiced by a God fearing woman. 

What immediately came to my mind is, if this group consisted of only men would we have the same responses? Definitely not! phrases  like  go get an olosho and ashana will rent the air and I keep asking myself why we have different standards of morals and ethics for the different Genders when it comes to our relationships marriages and general life  in Nigeria. i begin to wonder could be something that our culture has passed on o us? or could be because of the introduction of religions from outside our lands? maybe its just that a mixture of our old cultures and "modern day" religions mix as good as oil and water will mix 

lets take religion as an example, if you are one of those extremely religious bigots. please stop reading right now because I’m about to point fingers at a very sacred ethos in our day to day life in Nigeria. Religion! It goes without saying that if we did everything that the holy books teach us on how to deal and treat our women we will all end up as a holy chauvinistic bunch. Ehm… actually that’s what we are.

Take a deep breath, just before you draw your daggers and slide them underneath my rib cage. I can imagine the barrage of questions going on in your mind right mow. How dare he? Is he even a Christian/ muslim at all? Well, I am a Christian and I believe in the existence of the almighty. And No! I don’t take everything I read without asking questions. Only Robots do that. 

Because I am a Christian I would make my stand using verses in the bible. This is not to say that the bible is not a valid inspirational or religious book, however, we can’t take all that’s written there in hook line and sinker. For instance, when the bible was written, slavery was normal and ok. In fact the bible supported it. Now wait! Take a long pause. Yes! The bible supported the idea of slavery. In addition there were rules expressly stated on how to deal with male and female servants. The bible also says whoever works on the Sabbath day should be put to death. Put to death? Are you kidding me? Of course in the modern day you and I don’t have slaves and we work on weekends. Do you know anyone who hasn't being punished when caught for human trafficking or anyone who has hung on a tree for working on Sunday morning instead of going to church?

So if we don’t take some of this ancient laws seriously, why then should we take the ones that says women are second class? Why shouldn't we accord respect and honor to women leaders as we do with their male counterparts? Why can’t our women have a say? Why do we have to hold our  women to a higher moral conduct that their men can’t even dare to stand up to? Why on God’s green earth should a woman be made to stay in a loveless relationship or marriage? yes!! i believe in Divorce. if its not working.... its not working, start walking.

Unfortunately, it’s difficult to say that a whole nation has a chauvinistic culture from Hades, the most difficult set of people to convince on the issue of gender equality is the Nigerian women themselves  who have developed an innate mindset of servitude! (I guess its a societal thing)  I may not have all the answers to all the questions above. But this I know, we need to stop raising our girls with the notion that their male brothers are better than they are,  A child is a child and gender should be inconsequential from birth to death. Being religious is a great thing  people, but please for God’s sake  (Pun intended)let’s be intelligently religious. We are partners in a relationship with your spouses not master servant arrangement.my woman is my equal and i will respect love and cherish her for who she is, I only  wish we'd all do the same.

My Name is Aremo